Monday, September 20, 2010

A Reunion

How many people dream of being reunited with their babies that they relinquished for adoption and adoptees with their birth families? I would think that's a pretty long list.

I know I thought about the little girl that I gave birth to all the time. You might say that my life was consumed with her. Would it have been easier for me had I the chance to hold her in my arms or even gaze upon her tiny face? That wasn't the case for me because they took her from me immediately after I had been given gas.

How many people live in fear of being rejected if they reached out? I would say all of us. I know I was scared but also knew that I had to attempt it. It wasn't wonderful at first ~ the adoptive parents didn't want me to know my/their daughter. It was very painful but it also helped me to move forward in my life. I had a piece of the picture that I didn't have before. I now have a relationship with her and it is a loving one. We talk to each other every week and we fly out to each other's homes for visits.

Today on my talk radio show I had a birth mom and her birth daughter and they shared their lovely story of being reunited 50 years later. Together they wrote a book called, 'Fifty Years in 13 Days' which ia available on Amazon. Great read.....

Listen to their story on

1 comment:

  1. I am an adult adoptee who is also part of a waiting family hoping to adopt a child myself. I found out my biological mother's address about 7 years ago. I wrote to her and waited for a response. It took 3 weeks for her reply and it was pretty hard. I was actually WAY more prepared for rejection than I was to just simply being ignored. There are all sorts of reasons she could have had for not wanting any contact with me and I would have accepted any of those easily - how could I possibly understand what she went through and what I represented to her. Fortunately, she did finally write and we now have a good relationship which is not close, but we have both said that we feel connected even if it is months between the time we speak on the phone or email. It never occurred to me that she might just simply choose not to reply and, as the days wore on, I started to worry about that - a scenario I hadn't even thought of. So, I can only say that, if it does not work out for you to have a relationship with the other, once you've been contacted, at least let them know that. You can even tell them via someone else if you don't feel comfortable telling them personally. But do tell them. Not knowing is something that, as an adult adoptee in a closed adoption, I was used to. But when you get so close - to have a name and address, it would be really painful not to at least have some contact.

    Best to all of you. I hope for an open adoption myself. I realize not all adoptive families are open to that even if they say they are. My husband and I are taking classes to prepare for it and we've noticed a lot of the families seem really uncomfortable with the idea of "closeness" with the birth mother. I wonder why but they probably don't read a lot of birth mother's blogs like I do and/or know any birth mothers. I think it's good for everyone to just be educated on who birth mothers really are so they are not afraid to share the experience of that child's life with them. I wish my biological mother had gotten the chance but I was taken from her and she never knew anything about who raised me.

    My best to all of you. Sorry for such a long comment. :-)